Meh, Meh, Meh!

One thing I have struggled with during the lockdown is reading. I’m not sure why, because reading has always been a great form of escape for me. It’s as if my brain refuses to leave the place it’s at now to go to places of fantasy, murder, and intrigue. It’s frustrating to say the least.

Maybe it’s because I’m feeling like John Coffey in The Green Mile, which coincidentally is one of my favourite books.

There is a lot of awful stuff going on. Not just in South Africa, but globally. It makes me sad, even though I know there is nothing I can do about it. As far as possible I try to live in my little bubble, oblivious to what’s going on around me, but the muck still filters through.

I’m not sleeping again which isn’t helping matters either. I am waking up at all hours, thinking about all kinds of things.  Most nights it’s my aunt and how her diagnosis has affected The Bean. The two of them of more than sisters, they’re soulmates, family politics aside.

Other times I lie awake wondering if there is oil to be struck in my driveway. I said to Elizabeth earlier this week, “five years ago we earned less than we do now, but it was as if life was better.” We used to go out once a month for dinner and a glass of wine. Since the middle of last year, it just wasn’t possible anymore because of rising costs and our money devaluing almost weekly.

The lack of sleep means that my fuse is short. I am irritable and constantly craving carbs. I baked two loaves of bread on Sunday while at my folks. The one decided to explore outside the baking tin, so I got creative. The Bean and The Toppie kept the larger loaf and I took the smaller one home. Before I could really enjoy it, the ants made a meal of it, so I had to toss it in the garbage. Argh!

In other (less depressing) news, my windowsill garden is thriving. Eliza and Nathan offered that I can transplant the little veggie plants into their big garden at home, seeing that I don’t have the space. I will take the plants when I go and visit next week. I’m not good company at the moment.

What I need is sunshine and water. I’m progressing with the latter. I shall take a walk during the weekend. It should do me good.

Until next time, stay safe and let those close to you know you love them.

Hmph!

Warning:  I am in an extremely foul mood.  Use of expletives to vent my frustration is required.

Fuck, fuck FUCK!!!  It might as well have been Friday, the thirteenth today. 

The girls from work and Sandra’s friend, Kerry and I all went out for dinner to Panarotti’s last night – eat all the pizza you can for R49-95.  The hangover is the result of two glasses of free red wine because we had to wait an age for a table, and then a half a litre of Sangria with dinner.  My poor aching head.

To add insult to injury – Mom, in her infinite fucking wisdom, decided to have new remote controls activated for the garage doors, house alarm and new safety gate.  Why she insists on fixing something that isn’t broken, only she will know.  This morning I couldn’t get into my garage at all – not with the new remote, nor the old one!  And I was already late for work.  Fuck!  So, when I went upstairs telling her I would have to use Dad’s car to get to work, she almost had a hissy fit.  As if it is MY fault that the stupid fucking remotes aren’t working.

On my way to work (now even later than I was before!), I got pulled over by the traffic cops for a routine check.  THAT at least went off without a hitch, because quite honestly, if the traffic cop had fined me, I would probably have ended up in the chookie for crimen injuria.

Right, at work, things just seem to get worse…arriving late (obviously!) and then walking straight into the proverbial shitstorm.  Fridays are generally not good days at the farm because of millions of meetings and reports that have to be completed before lunch.  Imagine now how one is supposed to do the million reports when there is no electricity, until just after nine, and no coffee until then either!

Finally online, the reports begin…I pop off to the loo only to discover no water – the unexpected, excessive rain has resulted in a burst pipe 😦 

It is not a good day…on the flip-side, it can only get better (I hope!)