Last night I sat, chilled Chardonnay in hand, on the comfy chair in Elizabeth’s lounge chatting about 2011. Personally it wasn’t a bad year for me, but many people close to me lost someone important to them. Every time there was a loss, even though it didn’t directly link with me, it made me more and more aware of my own mortality.
I remember a post Aunty Carol put on Facebook – “Children, be careful of growing up too fast, because you forget that while you are, your parents are growing old.” This really touched me because I realize every time Dad comes home from a month at sea, that he has aged. Mom told me one night that she is ready to die and I burst into tears. She looked at me tenderly, “We’re all going to die sometime, my girl,” she said, “it’s the one thing no-one can escape.” Tears streaming down my face I said, “I know Mom, but I don’t want to think about it.”
I started a new job in April and I am so happy – I have been blessed with wonderful colleagues, an understanding boss and enough stimulation for my mind. Even more importantly, this job allows me to spend time with my family, my friends, do my writing and enjoy a good book every now and then.
I stopped drinking my anti-depressants (cold turkey) in mid-October and towards the end of November, I hit a very bad downer, but with the help of mostly my friends, I got through it.
Also, something I never thought I would ever do was exercise every day, let alone join the gym, but I did – and that too has made me a better person. I have made new friends there and even though I go for only an hour every day, I come home feeling energized and positive.
All in all, as I reflect on 2011, it was an okay year for me. I’m looking forward to 2012.
I don’t have any major resolutions for this year, but a few things I want to achieve are:
1. Submitting a complete manuscript to my tutor for proof-reading and editing and then rewrite it well enough to submit it for publishing consideration.
2. Practicing a random act of kindness every day – after all, there is a saying that says “be kinder than necessary to everyone you meet, for everyone is facing some kind of battle.”
3. Walk through the night at the annual CANSA Relay for Life.
4. Go on another cruise holiday (for my leave in December).
5. Blog daily – even if it is a short post, or simply a wordless photograph.
6. Be the best friend I can be to my friends.
7. Leave behind the past and focus on the future.
8. Reach my goal weight of 61 Kg by the end of June.
A friend of mine sent me this message this morning – and I believe that it is perfect to end this first entry of what I KNOW is going to be a great year…
“What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters to what lies within us. We all have questions about what this New Year will hold for us, but we have courage: “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose.” Romans 8:28